Spam

What is spam, really? (No, not the canned food).

I can quote a google definition of it just as easily as you can. The key words are irrevelant or inappropriate. (Let's remember these two words).

I'll tell you what spamming isn't. Receiving an invitation for an event from a friend.

When receiving a friend request from a stranger on any social media (Facebook, Goodreads, etc.) and accepting it, a certain degree of responsibility must be taken upon oneself.

Often I get Facebook friend requests from people I don't know. Being an author, most often these are fans following my work. Every so often, however, I will get a friend request - most often from an attractive young woman, her profile pic sporting a revealing tank-top or yoga-pants. Checking this potential friend's profile, I usually discover no history and no posts.

I cringe at these requests. Are they simply attractive fans? Is this a spamming scam? For those few I have accepted, inevitably, I soon find unwanted and unsolicated ads showing up on my Facebook pages.

The solution is a simple one. Unfriend the individual (and possibly report the spam to the authorities).

That being said, receiving an invitation to an event from a friend - although could, I guess, possibly, be spam - in all likelihood, is simply an invitation - plain and simple. (After all, you accepted them as a friend).

If the invitation is somehow irrevelant or inappropriate the solution is simple:

1) Answer "no" to the invite

2) block the new friend

3) Unfriend the new friend

4) Report the incident to the proper social media authorities as spam. (But please remember, you accepted their friendship), or

5) The most reasonable one - simply ignore it.

However, I stand corrected! I have had an individual choose to take a 6th option. The passive-aggressive path of a troll.

Rather than pursue the regular options, they chose to post (not a private message) an accusation of abuse, passive-aggressively stating:

"Thank you for abusing [insert Social Media Name] by friending me only to spam me..."

(This could actually be libel - the accusation of abuse in a print medium... hmmm...)

For the sake of anonymity, I will simply address this troll as Tod-Troll.

Tod-Troll, you know who you are. An invitation to an event (and, I might add, an appropriate and revelant one given the nature of the social media site in question), isn't spamming. It is simply an invitation. If you're not interested, either ignore it, or say 'no'. You're not a victim here, my friend.

I have had, over the years, one or two individuals politely ask me (through private messages) to stop inviting them to events. Cool. No problem.

Trolls must be frightened and insecure creatures. More comfortable in their misery and victimhood than in the uncertainty of positive change. They're looking for a fight. They're looking to convince anyone and everyone willing to listen of their state of being a victim.

The best course of action and advice that I know is this:

Don't feed the trolls.

Sorry Tod-Troll. I have no more food for you.